An Extraordinary Time Not to Write

This posting is as much an admission of guilt as it is an apology for the actions that led to the behavior that earned the guilt. To whit--I never would have thought that I'd spend over a month and a half in combat, and not write anything down about it in my blog. Heaven knows I've experienced enough of the breadth of combat in the past 45 days to generate some interesting comments and commentary. At the end of it all, though, here I am, sitting in front of a computer in a crowded MWR, and finding myself incapable of writing anything interesting.

I mean, assuming that the things that I write are interesting.

The fact is, while everything was happening, I was so deeply involved in it all--so engaged--that in retrospect I suppose it was inevitable that I'd get back, from days in the field, and just be--feel--totally washed out. More exhausted, less motivated, than at any point in the prior deployment. There were many occasions on which I felt angry, or frustrated, or steeped in some other similarly negative emotion, but I can remember no time when I felt nothing. It's gone on for a good 4 days now, at this point--ever since getting back from the last of 3 long, overlong extended missions.

This is new ground for me. Not motivated, not inspired, just trying to get through it all to the end. Tired of getting shot at.

Guess that means it's high time I found a new career!